~ the raven chronicles ~ 14

7 Aug

(Chapters are stored chronologically in ARCHIVES.)

The Diary of Rhea Sinclair

November 18, 1932

As the night extinguished I prayed to Isis.

The Osiris Nu whose word is truth saith
O thou land of the Sceptre.
O thou White Crown of the divine form.
O thou rest of the ferry-boat.

I am the Child Hail Abu-ur.

The slaughterblock is made ready as thou knowest and thou hast come to destruction. I am Ra who establisheth those who praise him.
I am the Knot of the god in the Aser tree
the twice beautiful one who is more splendid today than yesterday.

My prayers were answered.
Nepthys sent me a gift.
Unexpected and beautiful.

I knew not her coming. Upon my knowing I was unbelieving. That fate should deliver her into my hands. I did not expect one so weak could be my strength. One so timid could wield the cudgel of my bidding.
But she came. And she yielded herself to me. Completely.

I sensed her approach. I recognized the cadence of her footsteps in the hall. Like the chatter of birds in far away trees. My heart leapt.
Hargest put his key in the lock. The door opened.
She stepped into my cell. Her breath filled this dank cubicle with a gentle swirl of sweetness. Her scent filled me with longing and remembrance.
I remained with my eyes fixed on the morning sky. I could not look upon her while Agnostica was near. I could not allow him to see me vulnerable. I sent him away.
Hargest closed the door.
Eliza stood in silence. I savored what I knew was to come.
Finally she called softly to me like a lover at dawn.

Rhea. Rhea its Eliza. Ive come to visit.

The sound of her voice stirred my blood.

Rhea cant you turn and face me. Its Eliza.

I turned round.
My soul rejoiced as my eyes feasted upon her.
She flinched and stepped back.
Like someone in the presence of the angel of death.

Oh Rhea look at you. Are they treating you well.
Dont you have your own clothes Dear.
Oh how I wish you could return home. I could dote on you night and day.
Father is quite intransigent. He insists you stay here for no other reason than his spitefulness. I hate him so.

Jacob Drummond wanted sons.
Failing that he wanted daughters who thought like men.
Mental hermaphrodites in petticoats.
When I was 13 I gave myself to a cousin simply to thwart my Fathers designs. The entire Drummond clan knew of my Father’s temper.
This cousin was a boy just turned 16. Hesitant to despoil me for fear of terrible retribution from his uncle should it be discovered. I promised to never tell. Then I led him into the old boathouse. I laid down in the shadows. I lifted my skirt. I opened my legs. I arched my sex.
His trepidation vanished.
He hurriedly undid his trousers.
They had barely slipped to his knees before he spilled his seed in me.

That night in the darkness of our 3rd floor dormered room safe away from the rest of the household I told Eliza. She said it wasnt fair.
She pleaded and begged. So in the big bed we shared I showed her what our cousin had done to me. We slept entangled that whole night.
But never spoke of it again. So long ago I had near forgotten.
I see now it was fate. She became mine that day. It was our destiny.

Eliza remained near the door and prattled on in the way she has done since toddling. Kendree has been no help in that regard but you know him as well as I. He cares little for anything other than his pleasures.
Oh why did you marry him. He is nothing but a cad and a scoundrel.
You would not be here now if you had taken my advice.
Cant you speak. What is wrong with you.

I marveled at the blue of her eyes. So like mine.
And her lips red and moist.
And the slender curve of her neck.
A thing of beauty here in this place of repulsion.

Ive let Dr Agnostica know in no uncertain terms that you are now my ward and he is not to administer any treatment without my consent. I will not let you come to harm in the name of quackery. You must hold on Dear and I will convince Father to affect your release and have you brought home where you can recuperate from whatever it is that ails you surrounded by those who love you.

I could wait no longer. I opened my arms and bade her to me.
She bridled like a startled fawn. My fingers danced invitation.
Her hands fell to her sides. Her mouth went slack.
She slowly crossed the cell towards me.
She trembled as I enfolded her.
My lips found her lips.
I filled her mouth.
She shivered as I took her.
We became one.

I will now walk abroad.
Elizas eyes and ears will see and hear what I must.

I praise again the ancient ones.

I have come to be a protector unto thee.
I waft unto thee air for thy nostrils and
the north wind which cometh forth from the god Tem unto thy nose.

I have made whole for thee thy windpipe.
I make thee to live like a god.

Thine enemies have fallen under thy feet.
I have made thy word to be true before Nut
and thou art mighty before the gods.

The infidels will bow.
The priest shall know my power.

©2011 j.edwardfitzgerald all rights reserved


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